The Silver Lining – Inner Child Series Part 1

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Have you ever heard her Voice?

An artist’s work called “Love” at Burning Man in 2015 inspired me to write about our Inner Child.  Some people may be skeptical about the concept of an Inner Child but there could be no deeper truth if you have ever experienced it. Why is it some people experience miracles and connect deeply to a higher consciousness than others? Matt Khan explains
this very well.  Depending on your abilities and your own level of consciousness, where you are currently at, it determines what you will experience.  Not the other way around, where a spiritual being who practices so diligently, will automatically have higher miraculous experiences.  What you are, is what you will see and experience.

Some of the questions I had around this topic are: what would it feel like to know your inner child, hear the voice and know it is a witness to every experience of your life?  Each person has a significant lesson they choose to learn through the cycle of birth, and the people around us help us learn it by the relationships we build. Have you ever wondered why the same kind of people come into our lives? Or why we experience the same kinds of things over and over again?  We all make choices which is our free will, however most of us cannot identify the ego within and are very comfortable with a life without introspection. While being distilled in our own individuality, the Big “I” of the ego gives us a false sense of being special and unique.  Inevitability,  we feel separated in our own individuality instead of connected and when choices are made from the ego, limitations of our patterns will repeat.

Most yoga practices focus on the breath, and when this is done the mind naturally calms and you are able to fall into a relaxed state.  The space between each thought is silence and in the silence you have a chance to connect to a place of oneness and peace. When you have experienced this once, the point of bliss and connection becomes a part of you, you want to experience again and again.  Suddenly you realize there is more to my body, mind and reality of everyday life, and the quest to find out more begins.  However, it can only begin through silence of the mind. So, practice is the key.  As your views about life change, your choices change, and therefore your actions, words, habits, behaviors and experiences will also change.  All beliefs are tested so the “I” can be right all the time. The ego puts you through many predicaments, ready to fight, I am here to stay!  However, the connection to the place of truth is so powerful and the ego knows that, so there is a lot of fear of the unknown.  Seeing your own ego through the eyes of love can be a challenge.  All old beliefs, preconceptions and limitations have to be overcome.  Then space has to be created for new experiences with a greater understanding of oneness. Are you ready to see everyone from the eyes of truth with love?

“Love” Burning Man 2015 by, Alexandr Milovlove at burning man

In my early teens and twenties, maybe even before then, I could hear this voice inside but never paid attention to it. Until one day, right before I was about to get on the freeway, I heard her say “don’t go, Simi please don’t get on the freeway” I literally freaked out!! I was so young, only 23yrs old and I had no idea why this voice was saying this. I immediately called my older sister but I didn’t say why, I just thought If I call her everything will be okay.  I honestly had no idea what was happening, who was speaking to me, and how did she know my name?  She sounded pure, like a child with a very sweet voice.  However, it still made me panic.  Why shouldn’t I get on the freeway? What was so bad about it? I mean I drive everyday. I was actually on my way to a beauty salon to get my eyebrows done because my sister’s sister-in-law was getting married.  My mom happened to be in town for the wedding too. The voice was coming from inside me and if I was to put a location on it, it would be at the center of my heart.  However, my mind or my ego decided I was just being negative and I would go about my errands.  I don’t think I ever told anyone about this because I myself thought it was crazy.

However, what was about to happen was either going to end my life or leave me with a tragic experience full of fear.  Within two minuets of getting on the freeway, a white truck hit my car and I flew 5 lanes over the freeway.  My car landed upside down, and I was left hanging from my seatbelt.  There was so much glass which had shattered into splinters that had flown into the air.  The freeway, of course, had moving traffic but everything suddenly stopped.  Four men pulled me out of my window and one man who reached to get me out of the car was bleeding on his knees, the glass had cut him. He was worried the car was going to blow up.  They lifted me up, two men on either side of my shoulders, and two on either side of my feet.  It was surreal because I thought I was floating.  As they laid me down in the middle of the freeway, many people got out of their cars, called 911 and were ready to help. In addition to the four men, a lady was holding my hand and an Indian man, who happened to be a surgeon, began to check for internal bleeding. I could see the Summit which is now Joel Osteen’s Lakewood Church.  Soon after, the ambulance came and so on. At the time I wore glasses and they were no longer there and neither were my shoes. I did see my life flash before my eyes all the happy moments, like a flickering screen, 1 second shots… one after the other and at that moment I decided to stay here in this world.  Sometimes, I wonder why I didn’t just leave but there is only one reason – that is to experience more LOVE!

A layer of skin was cut badly on my hand and there was glass in my nose.  I was severely whiplashed and I could not move for about 6 weeks but other than that I was totally fine. I’d had several tests done on my brain and heart to make sure everything was okay. I also had a feeling of being invincible till reality set in. Sometimes I think about what if no
one had stopped to pull me out.  My Grandmother from London had called several times, she’d had a reoccurring dream of me for 3 days, where I was being taken away in an ambulance. Seeing this dream repeatedly had gotten her worried, and out of shock, my mom did not know how to tell her.

One thing changed significantly. My life became full of fear, I was no longer the girl I used to be “full of courage” and it has taken 15yrs to overcome.  As soon as I recovered from the accident I moved to California and started a new life.  The Sun was always shining, I was so happy and even started driving again.  However, when I moved back to Houston I was faced with that fear again.  Time passed by and I gradually started to forget but I had never quite dealt with the ripples of memory stuck in the fascia of my body. Ahlea Khadro, whom I wrote about in “Loving yourself to great Health” taught us how our cells have memory and how these ripples can get stuck.  My experience was remarkable as I discovered how to heal myself through connection and release.

The Masters at Dhan Yoga are divine in every sense of the word.  They have dedicated their lives to becoming masters of their practice and have the ability to help and heal many people.  One in particular, his name is Master Chung Suk, and when he was visiting Houston he asked me to meet with him randomly one day.  In Broken English he asked me “what troubles you?”  I said “I don’t know but I just can’t drive and every time I try I have to deal with this fear and I’m stuck because my job requires me to drive all around town, sometimes I’m driving 2hrs a day.” “I feel trapped; I wonder why I survived and I don’t know how to help myself.”  His response was “Everything is wonderful, everything is happy, I can help you.” I’m thinking how is this wonderful and happy, I mean really?  Now, this Master was very special!! He knew everything before I spoke, actually most of them do.  He took me through a technique called EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique).  He asked me to visualize the most fearful point of the accident; so I began to relive it!!! At this point I’m crying for surrender, crying for release. All the while, he was tapping with his finger on the side of my wrist, collar bone, forehead, knee, and asked me to repeat “I accept all the fear I have form this accident” over again and again. After each round he asked me “what level is your fear now?”  We did about ten rounds, maybe more and I have absolutely no clue what happened, but I went from feeling intense to calm. After I walked out, I drove home thinking my hand hurts and I looked down, it was bleeding a little.

Something had changed, so I began to test myself. Every time I got in my car that week I asked myself “Are you afraid?”  And there was no fear.  No FEAR. Wow No FEAR!!! So a mere fifteen minuets with this Master helped me where I had been suffering for 15yrs. How can this be?  Miracles, miracles, miracles!!! Well, this Master went back to Sedona after a couple of months and I never got to thank him.  I bumped into him this year when I was in Sedona and he was also just in Houston for a training, so I made sure to go meet with him.   I never judged myself for not listening to my inner voice. I was an innocent young girl who knew nothing about spirituality, nothing about the inner child, but this picture of “Love” at burning man reminded me of my experience and hearing my “Inner Voice” so I decided to write about it. As I started to write I couldn’t stop these past two months so there are actually three parts to the Inner Child series.  I look forward to sharing my next piece with you soon.

thank you for reading and loving me.

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